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If you have a Sanguine among the members family or or close friends you will surely know it. They are friendly, talkative, optimistic, funny, big picture people, exciting, funny and extremely enthusiastic. On the other hand they can also be messy, loud and forever late. They lose things and they often miss appointments.

What should you buy for them? Basically, you shouldn’t worry too much, as long as it sparkles :0).

Seriously, though Sanguines are delighted by anything new or novel. Choose over the top, frivolous items. Silly slippers, electric ties and singing bass are gifts that will be well received. Items that require a lot of discipline quickly lose interest for them.

• Comedy Club Tickets - Zanies Comedy Club in Nashville is a crowd pleasure.
• Concert tickets - Smash Mouth is a lot of fun.
• Dinner show tickets - If you are in FL, TX, GA, SC, IL, MD, NJ, CA or Toronto Medieval Times is a blast.
• Jewelry - Anything with diamonds, rubies, emeralds, turquoise or sapphires is a good choices as long as it isn’t too subdued.
• Flowers/cologne - Maitre Parfumeur et Sanguine Musikissime is an amazing choice but at $105 a ml you better hope they don’t misplace it.
• Coffee Cards - Right now Starbucks is still fun and trendy, a veritable prescription for the sanguine temperament for pleasure.

It may seem odd to find a gift giving guide on a site devoted to topics of counseling, guidance, temperament and behavior but I find many of those I speak with experience a tremendous amount of angst and anxiety when it comes to selecting a Christmas gift for those who are not of the same temperaments as themselves. With that in mind I have put together a gift giving guide compatable to the temperaments

If you have a choleric in your family or inner circle you already know they are all about control and power. So, how do you choose a Christmas gift FOR someone who prefers to control every element of their own lives as well as many elements of the lives of others?

Keep their underlying tendencies in mind. They are strong willed, independent, and they are leaders. Thy are decisive and direct and are never at a loss as to what they think about anything! They like things to be done their way and done their way now.

Here are some suggestions for what you could buy to keep your Choleric happy at Christmas. First remember they like things they don’t have to read the instructions because they view directions and instructions as someone telling them what to do.

1. Although your first reaction might be a generic gift card, they will view that as you not being able to make a choice and will smirk and perhaps disdain it. However, if you give them a gift card for a specific item that you may have heard them express and interest in, they will view that as an intelligent and decisive use of your time.

2. Another excellent choice for the Choleric is the “Power Tool.” The very name power tool strokes the innermost needs of their souls. And, their are so many to choose from that you should be able to find an appropriate one no matter what their area of interest.

• carpentry tools - Stanley
• mechanical tools - Craftsman
• business tools (laser pointer, PDA, pen/pencil set, digital recorder).

3. Don’t forget my home is my castle focused Choleric.

• vegetable chopper - Pampered Chef makes nice one
• automatic sweeper - Roomba Discovery is a good choice
• knife set - six star cutlery is good
• grinder - Consider Norpro
• presser - Cuisinart Pro Classic is impressive

I recently shared a link to a website (The PositivityHub) that does its best to provide uplifting yet realistic material and resources for its readers. I incorporated in my post an invitation for other authors who write positive content to list their site with the promise that I would review them as well. Jacqueline Stone took me up on the offer and told me about her site. The message and my follow up are listed below.

“My web site, www.journey2happiness.com, provides articles, images, and videos to inspire and empower visitors. I do not have products for sale. There are no blaring ads or flashing signs. It is a place of peace on the internet where visitors can refresh both mind and spirit. The home page contains links to my blogs, where I welcome comments from other travelers on the Journey to Happiness. I invite you to visit the video page on my site, where you will find video teachings from Wayne Dyer, Deepak Chopra, Neale Donald Walsch, Gregg Braden, and Abraham-Hicks. Everything on my web site is available free of charge. My purpose is to share what I have learned with love and joy that others may come to know what it is to live with peace in their hearts.”

I followed the link back to the site and found it to be just as advertised. The site hosts a collection of essays focused on self-empowerment and recovery from past hurts. In addition the advertisements are also as described, very subtle and well below “the fold.” In fact there are not even embedded content specific advertisements like those I use to defray costs on ElementalTruths.Com.

Additionally the author lists two other blogs On The Journey and Recovering From Abuse, both blogspot sites. They two follow subtle patterns and subdued colors. My only concern with them is that they both have the embedded blogtalk radio features that launch their audio component as soon as you scroll down to that section of the page.

The colors are subdued and the font is muted, presumably to generate a feeling of comfort and safety. I prefer article a different “feel” for my publications. Being a male I naturally lean toward more blues and grays and I accept that isn’t the preference of all.

You should check it out. As a matter of my own interest, I would particularly like to here your reaction to the site based on your gender.

If you enjoy the site, or if you have a site you would like me to explore please comment here or email me at RegAdkins@gmail.com.

Have you had an opportunity to read The Positivity Hub?

I encountered it by following the profile of a commenter here. It contains a series of insightful and profound observations by the author known as “Seeker.”

Seeker identifies himself with the following profile.

“I am a seeker trying to understand the rules of this universe. I want to be a person who is happy and positive, helps others, pursues my dreams without fear and is free of all negative emotions. Please allow to send my prayers to help you become the person you want to be and live your best life. If you like what you read here, please link to this blog. I would greatly appreciate it.”

I’m intrigued and you may be as well.

Do you have a website you would like me to mention and link to?

Just post a comment and I’l get right to it.

As always, I wish you Great Peace and Grace.

Reg Adkins

Weight loss requires burning more calories than you take in. There is the magic. There is an entire industry of books, gadgets and videos that tell you what kind of calories you should consume. It is all nonsense if you are consuming more calories than you burn. You may facilitate calorie burning by taking in fewer calories and increasing exercise to augment the calorie burning process. Eat a balanced diet consisting of less calories than you are burning and you will lose weight.

The important thing to remember is that you eat less, not nothing. You will lose weight slowly and safely but you must eat so that your metabolism does not slow to the point where you are not burning enough calories to lose weight sending your metabolism into starvation mode. If your body perceives a consistent large calorie deficit as a threat, it begins to store fat to combat the famine conditions. 

If you want to lose fat the American College of Sports Medicine (ACSM) recommends that calorie levels never drop below 1200 calories per day for women or 1800 kcal per day for men.

A complete program includes resistance training, aerobic training, interval training, cross training, small frequent meals containing high-quality protein and carbohydrate, and low-glycemic nutrition. Lots of water and sufficient rest are a must.

More muscle equals less body fat over time. A pound of muscle requires at least 35 calories a day to function; a pound of fat only needs 1 or 2 calories. When you build muscle, you boost your resting metabolic rate (RMR), so your body burns more calories, even when youre asleep.

There are approximately 3500 calories in a pound of stored body fat. So, if you create a 3500-calorie deficit through diet, exercise or a combination of both, you will lose one pound of body weight. If you create a 7000 calorie deficit you will lose two pounds and so on. The calorie deficit can be achieved either by calorie-restriction alone, or by a combination of fewer calories-in (diet) and more calories-out (exercise). This combination of diet and exercise is best for lasting weight loss. Indeed, sustained weight loss is difficult or impossible without increased regular exercise.

If your goal is fat loss, the scale is an extremely poor tool for measuring progress, particularly when you are doing any kind of weight training.

For the first few weeks, write down everything you eat - youll learn a lot about yourself, and your daily estimates may not even be close otherwise. If you follow roughly the same meal plan every week, it is definitely worth the effort to carefully and honestly estimate the calories of your usual meals using a measuring cup and an inexpensive food scale. If you do this even once, youll find that its much easier to track your daily intake accurately.

Here is a checklist of things that can be done:

1. Choose small servings (large portions may contain twice the calories)

2. Eat slow-down foods (for example, an orange instead of orange juice)

3. Drink lots of water

4. Follow a daily food plan (impulsive choices tend to be high in calories)

In short, get active, eat healthy, be at peace with yourself, and learn to accept yourself. Accept that healthy and thin are not equal or go hand in hand.

scorpion and frog courtesy of flickr creative commons

What is behavior?

Behavior is the physically observable manifestation of an unmet need.

Let’s take it to the elemental level of your underlying temperament. Observable behavior is the demonstrable result of three things.

One, your desire to give and receive affection.

Two, your desire to be included and to include others the daily
activities of life.

Three, your desire to be in control contrasted with your tolerance for
being controlled.

The path you follow to meet these needs drives your behavior. The ideal is to find equilibrium in each of these areas.

Behavioral problems (maladaptive behaviors) develop when those realms skew too far to one side or the other.
Let’s look at the extremes to illustrate the point.

A person who demands affection from everyone but gives it to
none.

A person who wishes to be included in the lives of others but refuses
to allow them to be involved in his own.

A person who demands complete control of all those they interact with
but will tolerate no controls on themselves.

Now let’s flip the perspective.

A person who refuses any affection but lavishes it on others.

A person who refuses to take part in the lives of others but constantly
involves you in their own.

A person who refuses to offer input into the difficult choices others must
make but wants someone to make all their decisions for them.

As you can see, neither extreme will get the person to their destination in life.

Often those who come to me for help, merely need a nudge to center them between any two of these extremes.

To illustrate the underlying nature of temperament I love this parable:

Scorpion was on a long journey and came to a broad river which he could not cross.

There at the river bank sat Frog.

Scorpion asked Frog for a ride across the river.

Frog said, “No, for you will surely sting me and I will die.”

Scorpion said, ” I will not sting you because if I did I would surely drown in the river.”

Frog considered this and finally agreed.

Halfway across the river Scorpion stung frog and they both began to sink.

Frog said,”Why did you do this thing? Now we will both surely die.”

To which the Scorpion said, “What do you expect, I’m a scorpion?”

When you make a decision to improve your health by losing weight you need some tool other than a misleading bathroom scale to let you know what progress you are making. I pulled together some calorie expenditure information that will help you measure your progress.

Set a daily caloric intake that will cause a gradual weight loss, probably 1500 to 1800. Subtract from that the additional expended calories from the list below. This should get you well on your way to a healthier life.

Rember, taking in more than 1500-1800 calories a day will likely stifle your ability to drop weight.

Calories expended during certain activities in a 30 minute time period accounting for gender and base weight.

Activity: Male (175 lbs): Female (135 lbs)

Biking 12-13.9 mph: 334: 258
Circuit Training: 334: 258
Stretching, hatha yoga: 167: 129
Dancing - general: 188: 145
House Cleaning - vigorous (mop, wash car): 188: 145
House Cleaning - light (dusting, vacuuming): 104: 81
Playing w/ kids moderate - walk/run: 167: 129
Gardening: 209: 161
Mowing lawn - Hand mower: 251: 193
Running - 6 mph: 418: 322
Jogging: 292: 225
Basketball - Game: 334: 258
Children’s Games: 209: 161
Football: 334: 258
Frisbee: 125: 97
Horseback Riding: 167: 129
Skating: 292: 225
Soccer: 292: 225
Softball/Baseball: 209: 161
Tennis: 292: 225
Hiking: 251: 193
Walking - 4 mph, level surface: 167: 129
Walking - leisure: 146: 113
Canoeing/Rowing - moderate: 292: 225
Kayaking: 209: 161
Swimming laps freestyle - moderate: 334: 258
* Data from ACSM Resource Manual for Guidelines for Exercise Testing and Prescription Third Edition

I just read an excellent piece of work written by Steve Pavlina. the article was titled “How to Take Action Consistently.” In summary it is a really great bit on the importance of avoiding the quagmire of over thinking things and taking decisive and positive action.

But my favorite part was a paragraph section he titled “How to Create and Ride Thought Waves.”

Gosh that title got my mind revved up to do some creative thinking. Without even reading the content it inspired me to some outside the box thinking.

Mind mapping practically took over my thought process and I sat for at least 30 minutes in a creative free association mode. I rolled through concepts of every thing from the Silver Surfer to visual imaging of physically surfing the waves of the world wide web.

This simple mental exercise recharged me mentally and spiritually. Then, just at the height of the experience someone made a mundane negative comment (something about the less than ideal physical structure we happened to temporarily be working in at the time) and the whole experience burst like a too full balloon.

I’m trained in a lot of techniques, including graphic recall, and so was able to recapture the creative swell fairly easily. But, it dawned on me, most folks are not so trained. That is why it is so important to set aside time to refill your creative batteries and protect those times jealously.

Only be taking care of your own needs can you care for the needs of others. Even the airline carriers tell you “in case of a sudden cabin depressurization you should put the oxygen mask over your own face before attempting to come to the aid of others.

Even if Steve Pavlina wasn’t a great writer (which he is) I’d still read his work just for the creative titles.

As always I invite you to subscribe and share your thoughts.

First, there is no such thing as a Negative Calorie Food.  Calories are simply units of energy. No foods intrinsically have negative calorie value. Items that have no food value, are not food. In fact I have treated individuals who ate things that were not food items. To do such is symptomatic of  a disorder known as pica.

That being said, there is an interest in the behavioral and counseling fields as well at that of health and fitness in this subject. So, lets explore it.

The energy that the body needs to digest the food is usually given as a certain amount of calories. Theoretically, if more energy is required to break down a food item than is released from the digestion of that food a loss of calories is experienced by the body.

There is no sound evidence to support the premise of a “negative calorie diet.”

While consuming low nutrient, high cellulose foods such as celery may expend more energy to digest than is absorbed, the difference is of negligible consequence metabolically.

However, many of the foods promoted as having a negative caloric effect are, in fact, healthful foods. People restricting caloric intake may choose such items as snacks or as part of meals.

Foods promoted as having “negative calorie” effects are mainly vegetables. Many are low in calories, and have enough indigestible fiber to require significant digestive work.

Fruits, because of sugar content, are unlikely to truly be negative calorie foods.

Here are a few choices of foods that are high enough in fiber to require your body to work at digesting them and yet not particularly high in caloric content.

What are your thoughts on this topic?

Remember to add ElementalTruths to your bloglines reader and comment about any topic you would like to see explored.

No matter how well you market yourself, your service, or your organization you will not be able to operate a successful business if you can’t keep your clients coming back and bringing their friends. Every time a client leaves your operation they need to feel “Wow, that guy really went the extra mile for me.”

You must always keep in mind, it’s just a short drive down the road to the next shop.

Here is an outline of strategies that show how to keep them coming back. These strategies have been carefully designed to appeal to every temperament type.

1. Demonstrate pride in what you do, especially in how you meet the needs of your clients. If you have certifications, diplomas, or letters of recognition display them. If you have testimonials from current and past clients post them.
2. Acknowledge the client as soon as they enter. It doesn’t take any time at all to smile, nod, wave or better yet greet them by name. This is not the mechanical Walmart greeting. It must be a sincere welcome. If you aren’t in front to greet your clients be certain to train you front line staff in the importance of making a client feel important as soon as they enter the room.
3. Make eye contact with your client when they are speaking. Pay attention two what they say. Active listening is an art and it is an art that you must consciously think about. Continue to actively attend to what your client is saying in order to provide them the service they need.
4. Introduce yourself to the client. “I’m Reg Adkins and I’m glad you decided to read my post in Elemental Truths today.” And I really am. I am pleased at every visitor I get and I like the visitor to know about it.
5. If you must make your client wait, make sure you have a darn good reason and that you tell them what it is. Notice, “I was taking a break,” is NOT a darn good reason. Neither is checking your voice mail, email or text messages. A good reason is providing the best service you can to the client you are currently working with.
6. When you can’t give a client exactly what they want, explain why and tell them what you can do instead. I find I often get requests from clients to find ways to change the behavior of someone else. That can’t be done. What can be done is an adjustment of your understanding of the behavior so that you can better interact with that person.
7. If you make a promise, keep it. Honor the promise even if it costs you big. If you don’t it will cost you even bigger. I promise clients a 5 visit model of counseling. If I can not help them get started in the right direction by that time, I probably can’t get them started in the right direction. I don’t have a problem with that because not every counselor is the right counselor for every person with a problem.
8. If you absolutely must use an after hours answering machine, returning those calls should be your first order of business in the morning. I recommend doing this the first half hour before you officially open. This way new clients aren’t kept waiting while you return calls. See item 5. I sometimes counsel individuals who are on extreme emotional brinks. It is paramount that they receive the support they need as soon as possible. I have arrangements with other counselors to take my calls on certain evenings and I take their calls on others.
9. Never let a client out your door without an invitation and a reason to come back. So, please come back to Elemental Truths tomorrow because I will be continuing with other suggestions you will be able to use.
10. Know what you will do if the client responds “No” when you ask him if everything met with his approval. By that token, if you not satisfied with anything here at Elemental Truths, I ask that add your suggestion to the comments section telephone or email me directly at regadkins@gmail.com or 336/908-5177. I’ll do what I can to implement the improvements you suggest.

As always I invite you to add Elemental Truths to your bloglines readers and post any comments you feel like sharing.