Temperament Counseling The Big Bad Wolf
Over the years I’ve answered a lot of questions about the essence of temperament analysis and how it can be used as a counseling technique to help people. But, it seems I answer the same basic questions over and over.
So, inspired by a brilliant little book titled Fish! by Stephen Cundin, Harry Paul, and John Christensen, I’ve written this little parable which tells the fictitious story of the Big Bad Wolf, who after scores of poor choices and years of misbehavior was pressed into counseling to find a way to address his maladaptive, antisocial behaviors.
The story opens as the Big Bad Wolf arrives for his first day of required counseling.
Dr. Adkins: Hello Mr. Big Bad Wolf. How are you today?
BBW: I’m okay, I guess.
Dr. Adkins: Good. Do you prefer Mr. Wolf, or Big Bad perhaps?
BBW: BB is fine.
Dr. Adkins:Alright, BB it is then. I see here that you are here for required temperament counseling. Can you tell me about that?
BBW: Yeah. I had to come here. Supposedly, I have some “issues” I’m supposed to work on. Say, just what is this temperament analysis stuff anyway and how can it help me?
Dr. Adkins: Temperament analysis is a counseling method designed to help you find appropriate ways to meet your underlying needs for affection, inclusion and control in acceptable ways that don’t infringe upon the rights and needs of others.
BBW:Oh great. Another touchy, feely “talk therapy” jockey who wants me to tell them how upset I am because my mommy didn’t hold me enough for endless months on end. This is sure to be useful. What do you know about me anyway? How many more minutes until we’re done?
Dr. Adkins:BB, your attempts to maneuver me into avoiding issues aren’t going to to be successful. I understand that you may be feeling distrustful and suspicious. You may even doubt my qualifications. Let me put one of your concerns to rest. My credentials are clearly displayed and you are welcome to examine each of them at your leisure.
I don’t feel compelled to explain myself. Remember, you came to me. On the other hand, I do want you to be at ease. So, I will discuss some of your concerns.
This is not talk therapy. Talk therapy can last for months or years. This is temperament analysis. The model is designed around a five session plan. If I can’t help you in five sessions, I probably can’t help you. Further, I’m not overly concerned about how much you were or were not held as a youth. Although, your desire to express and receive affection is definitely an element of your temperament and we will look into. I’m more interested in helping you find ways to meet your needs now in a positive way. In addition, as you say I don’t know you very well, we will be utilizing this temperament analysis tool to help us identify your basic needs for affection, inclusion and control.
Now, if your interested in finding the way to a better life, complete this temperament analysis and the intake forms and let’s get moving on this. Or, continue your downward spiral until you’re ordered to another counselor. The choice is yours.
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After some reflection and examination of his options BB decided to go ahead and commit to the 5 sessions. He figured it would get the heat off his back and, truth be told, he was kind of intrigued about this concept that everyone has the same needs for control, affection and inclusion but they are expressed at different levels.
BB completed the intake forms and the Temperament Analysis and we set the appointment for his first counseling session.
In the next installment we will explore the results of BB temperament analysis and commence the scheduled prescription of sessions.
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