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Try this exercise to see how true you are to yourself.

Circle all the words in this list that describe the person you would like to be.

You may wish to print the list to make this a more manageable exercise.

pretty attractive beautiful cute nice-looking appealing cool sweet spiritual wise nice friendly faithful leader strong supportive moral ethical principled good honest decent warm loving tender warmhearted demonstrative caring kind affectionate cordial hospitable welcoming amiable cheerful passionate fiery enthusiastic zealous arrogant egocentric altruistic sympathetic humane selfless philanthropic smart dependent free gentle thoughtful domineering submissive autonomous creative compassionate self-sufficient private liberated conventional objective elegant clever stylish intelligent quick charming tidy neat thoughtful attentive careful watchful alert reliable inspired inventive resourceful ingenious productive exciting energetic lively vigorous bouncy active joyful blissful pleased ecstatic cheery sane rational sensible reasonable normal complete capable genuine inspiring proud approachable peaceful honest giving nurturing accomplished whole perfect undivided achiever great confident compassionate content humble unassuming happy satisfied comfortable at ease relaxed able knowledgeable skilled proficient expert adept rich wealthy affluent prosperous full gorgeous valuable abundant fruitful powerful deep prolific understanding dynamic useful helpful constructive beneficial positive functional worthwhile

Now circle all the words from this list that describe how you really are.

pretty attractive beautiful cute nice-looking appealing cool sweet spiritual wise nice friendly faithful leader strong supportive moral ethical principled good honest decent warm loving tender warmhearted demonstrative caring kind affectionate cordial hospitable welcoming amiable cheerful passionate fiery enthusiastic zealous arrogant egocentric altruistic sympathetic humane selfless philanthropic smart dependent free gentle thoughtful domineering submissive autonomous creative compassionate self-sufficient private liberated conventional objective elegant clever stylish intelligent quick charming tidy neat thoughtful attentive careful watchful alert reliable inspired inventive resourceful ingenious productive exciting energetic lively vigorous bouncy active joyful blissful pleased ecstatic cheery sane rational sensible reasonable normal complete capable genuine inspiring proud approachable peaceful honest giving nurturing accomplished whole perfect undivided achiever great confident compassionate content humble unassuming happy satisfied comfortable at ease relaxed able knowledgeable skilled proficient expert adept rich wealthy affluent prosperous full gorgeous valuable abundant fruitful powerful deep prolific understanding dynamic useful helpful constructive beneficial positive functional worthwhile

Now count the number circled in the first list and make it the top have of a fractional representation over the number of words circled in the second list.

How close are you to making who you are the person you want to be?

Daily life can present a lot of challenges. Some times you need a nudge to enable you step back and have an objective look about.

Elemental Truths is about helping each other along with those nudges. But, it isn’t the only place you can find them. Sometimes you can find nudges on the bumper of the car stuck in traffic in front of you. Here are a few of the nudges I’ve collected that help me along with a smile and I hope they help you too.

Always smile first thing in the morning.

It’s best to just get it over with.

I would be completely unstoppable, if I could just get started.

Remember, you are completely unique

just like everyone else.

If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.

But, if at first you do succeed,

try not to look so surprised.

If at first you don’t succeed,

conceal all evidence that you ever made the attempt.

If you want proof people are listening to you…

make a mistake!

Power corrupts.

Absolute power is really cool!

Do your best to take one day at a time…
but don’t be too upset if sometimes
all the days attack you at once.

No, I am not tense.
I am just very, very alert.

Do you believe in love at first sight?
Or would you like to read this list again?

Everyday I encounter people who feel they could be “doing better” if they only knew someone who would give them a leg up. I am the first to admit that having friends in high places is a definite advantage. But, not in the way many people believe it to be.

In most situations “who you know” will definitely open doors for you. But, mastery of you underlying temperament and “what you know” determines whether you will be able to take up residence in the new region beyond that opened door.

In fact I would have to give two elements of advantage an approximate equal value. A college diploma. An established friend in a desirable place of employment. Either one will get you the proverbial foot in the door, which is to say, an interview. Skill at tasks and the ability to capitalize on your temperament are what get and keep you in a job.

In fact, the SCANS (Secretary’s Commission on Achieving Necessary Skills) published in 1991 (finalized 1992) indicated their are ten competencies and skills that make you a desirable and employable person.

1. Reading
2. Writing
3. Performing mathematical operations
4. Listening
5. Speaking
6. Thinking
7. Interpersonal Skills
8. Information Management
9. Understanding of Systems
10. Technological Literacy

• My bonus addition would be Typing or Keyboarding.

The other option would be knowing the “right people.” If that is the true course what are the steps to follow it?

Coleen Watson has these suggestions.

1. First build a personal network inventory.
2. Ask those on your inventory to introduce you to those on their inventory.
3. Ask you boss who you should try to meet in the industry.
4. Call some of the people you wish to add to your inventory and introduce yourself.
5. Recommend your peers when opportunities they could fulfill arise and recommend them.
6. Be nice. People who aren’t nice to the waiter, to the dog and to children aren’t nice. Dont’ be one of those people.
7. Become a hub. Help as many other people make connections as you can.

The question remains, which of these skill sets is truly requisite and therefor “the” key to success?

What are your thoughts gentle readers?

We have spent the last two hundred years convincing ourselves that more education is the solution to financial success. As a result we have gotten a lot better educated. But, there have been some unintended consequences as well. One of the collateral developments of that philosophy has been at least one generation of adults who are forever trapped in the mindset of someone seeking to be educated, specifically a childish mentality.

Before I am attacked, allow me to explain. There are a few things that identify someone as a “good student.”

1. They are quiet.
2. They are focused on the moment at hand.
3. They have a desire to please the person in charge.

In other words they are really quite “hare-brained.”

Now let’s consider a highly effective staff member.

1. Active and Interactive.
2. Aware of long term mission effects.
3. Willing to make a stand for their beliefs.

Hmm…notice any conflicting themes?

People need to know how to interact with others and take an active role in a responsible manner in order to make a valuable contribution.

What can you do to counter act the difficulties from developing as a result of this “Peter Pan” or “Hare Brained” phenomena?

1. Policy and Procedure.
Develop and implement clear procedures and routines for routine operations. Once the routine is taken care of people are more free to explore growth ideas.

2. Mentoring.
One of the most effective preventatives you can implement in a mentorship program. Partnering a immature individual with your “rock of Gibraltar” staff member has a wonderful moderating effect on both parties.

3. Team Roles.
Be certain that each member of your team has a role to fulfill for which they and they alone are accountable.

Although, the above strategies will help you when the problem is beginning to develop (as with a new employee), sometimes you find yourself in the unpleasant circumstances of inheriting a problem (dependent personality) that is already fully developed.

Here a few few suggestions.

1. Proximity Control.
Nothing quite so subtly and effectively focuses a subordinate like the boss dropping by and spending 5 minutes on a regular basis.

2. Ready Reference.
Require these individuals to keep the mission statement on their desk

3. Spot Check.
Periodically ask the staff member to outline their job responsibilities for you, with careful attention to how it has grown and evolved since the last outline. You may be astounded at what some people think their job is when compared to what it actually is.

A few days ago I ran an article that asked us all to look at how we react to visual imperfections. I was puzzled because marketing experts go to great lengths to show us the “perfect” image when presenting their products. But, we seem to take greater notice of that which is less than the ideal. Has perfect become so expected in marketing that most temperaments consider it passe?

I decided to do a bit of market analysis myself. I sent out a call to some of the beast and brightest folks I know who span the spectrum of temperaments. I asked for the thoughts of folks who are high in the choleric range and those that are very sanguine as well as a generous contribution of supines, melancholies, and phlegmatics. What I got was some really fascinating and insightful observations.

I would like to share some of these reactions these reactions with you here ( in no particular order).

Bert Webb of Open Loops offer the following interpretation.

Dirty? No, not just dirty, but the negative, the nasty, the bloody, the messy — for most of us, anyway. We pass the same patch of flowers each day and hardly notice them, yet slowdown to look at an accident that occurred right in the middle of them. The entire evening news program is filled with negatively slanted stories — murder, robbery, annexation arguments — and editors/directors save one positive story with which to end the broadcast (remember “If it bleeds, it leads”?). Teachers have hundreds and thousands of students during the course of their career, but when tasked to remember them, the challenging ones rise to the forefront of our minds and we struggle to remember the good ones.

I don’t think it’s because we’re hard-wired for it. There are many people who still have that optimistic outlook, avoid the negatives in their lives and concentrate on looking at the good in every situation. They are proactive in keeping the negative out of their lives. I think the rest of us have been trained to be negative, trained by our parents, our peers, our environment and our media. When we are forced to see and hear the negative throughout most of our day, our brains then begin to filter for it. This, unfortunately, is a learned behavior.

The ever creative Tori Deaux of MindTweaks opines..

I’d say we’re hardwired to notice things that are out of place, not quite right, not as they should be, and yes, dirt. It’s keyed into survival - in less privileged times, out-of-placeness can be cues to both food sources and dangers. I also remember reading some research last year about how the brain is wired to be repelled by contamination - and that intellect doesn’t over rule that wiring. Grocery stores cannot put toilet paper in the same aisle as canned goods, because the brain marks the toilet paper as a source of contamination, and therefore, food that’s close to it is “contaminated” too. Knowing that the TP is clean, and the food is sealed, doesn’t over rule the ewww factor. It’s more primal than that.

So.. as a mind tweaker… I’d say we notice dirty things because we’re hardwired to do so. What we do with the info depends on a lot of less solid sorting factors. Or something like that. Maybe. Kinda. Sorta.

(BTW… I agree with Mother Earth.. Leave the car dirty, wash the child’s face, and I’d add in… tell him its rude to stare!)

Karen Hanrahan (aka Mother Earth) of Best Wellness Consultant offers…

my very maternal side would definitely want to wash that lovely childs face, is that caring or is it perfection - I believe the child’s view would be hey I”m fine the way I am

for me it’s my desire to care for

i had a dirty phase in my life where I tried to get as filthy as I possible could — just because it seemed fun

parallel to being sort of grungy in HS - I did that too

hmmm what does that say about my temperment

mother earthy ??

the dirty vehicle? Wastes water to wash it - let it sit in the rain instead! Gave up on that one a long time ago!

Ted Demopoulos of Blogging for Business, our ever insightful lens into the business world offers the following interpretation.

Well, part of it is that we notice different. For example a clean kid among a group of dirty ones would stand out too.

I think it’s more than just that, but that’s a big part. We been taught that clean is good, e.g. “Cleanliness is next to Godliness”

As a side note, my wife is out of commission, recovering from an operation for 6-8 week and I’m Mr Dad.

Kids are dirty than ever But their hygiene is probably improved. Stains on clothes? Who cares. Eating or snacking? Wash hands.

Finally, the Relationship Geek of Make it Great! Phil Gerbyshak provides the following interpretation.

Very interesting to think about Reg. Looking at the van, my first thought is “Dang, who owns this dirtball?” My second thought was, “That’s cute. Someone took the time to write Wash Me but didn’t take the time to actually wash the van. Nice.”

I don’t know if it’s because of, or in spite of, the imperfections, that I’m drawn to these pictures. They definitely do help the mind wander, and wonder, what’s going on.

Those were the reaction I was able to gather from some of the most insightful folks I know.

If you don’t see your interpretation here, I love to add it to the feature. So comment and let’s see if we can add your insight as well.

Is it possible to have your guiding leadership style stymied by another team member? It is not only possible it is common place. I have been called in to assist many leadership teams who were doing all the right and empowering things, and yet obstructions kept finding their way across the group path.
Often I have been able to identify the obstruction and provide a new path that builds upon it, circumvents it, or in some cases removes it.
First, you must be able to identify the barrier. You may be surprised to learn that someone who was once the backbone of an operation has now become the blockage. This sometimes occurs in organizations which have experienced growth or sudden restructuring and an individual can no longer coordinate all the expanding activities. For a choleric who has a tremendous need for control of everything, this is a disastrous circumstance.
This may be the individual who works in every area of the group and knows no boundaries thereby appearing to be someone who is working hard to keep everyone moving, when in reality they are leaving little land mines of negative energy and depression as they travel about asking loaded questions and making demands for immediate action from those already operating at the optimum level of performance.

This is individual who is unable to delegate for fear someone other than themselves will receive credit.
This individual is interested in superficial perfection only. They are the epitome of a “mile wide and an inch deep.”
What preventative steps can you take with an individual who has control issues that are interfering with the success of your organization?

Well, if you have time to wait, they will eventually self destruct or get promoted out of your way. If not, there are a few suggestions you might wish to try.

1. Provide Control. This may seem counter intuitive but those who must have control are most comfortable when there are clearly defined limits of the areas they may control. Your task is to define those limits and realms of influence and make certain those boundaries are respected.

2. Responsibilities. Make certain the individual does not take on more responsibilities than they can efficiently handle. Otherwise you are damning the stream of work and forcing too much to channel through one individual. The rule of thumb is 5 to 7 areas of responsibility. Less than five and the problems of inactivity develop. More than seven and a bottleneck develops.

3. Team Development. Structure work to promote equal value and participation of all team members. This is an excellent eye opener for those who tend to be controlling in nature.

What can you do once a problem develops?

1. Mission Statement. Remind the person that everyone in the organization has the same goal of success in mind. Make them aware that everyone is on the same side and must work together if destinations are to be reached.
2. Reinforcement. Make certain to acknowledge and reinforce positive decisions and delegations when they are made.
3. Circumvent. Temporary sidestepping is sometimes necessary when time does not allow for more permanent solutions.
4. Cause and Effect. When an individual is unable to give up the tendency to micro-manage you must explain to them the ultimate result of failing to work with the group.
5. One Accord. It is impossible to reach a destination if the members of the group do not maintain respect and deference for one another. Tolerating the domination of one person by another is enabling a problem which will eventually destroy your organization. Those who refuse to work for the common good must be removed from the group.

Of course if they are in a supervisory position to you fall back to the wait until they self destruct or get promoted philosophy.

Why do things that aren’t perfect (or perfectly clean) catch our attention?

Take a look at the vehicle above. When you first glanced at it did you notice that is was a rather mundane mini-van or did you notice the “Wash Me” message scribbled in dirt on the rear windshield?

Look at the young boy at the bottom. What do you notice first about him? Was it the striking striped polo shirt or were the finger print dirt streaks across his face first to draw your attention?

The truth is, regardless of our temperament, we are fascinated by that which is not perfect. Whether we embrace it as a sign of the human kind or we yearn to clean or correct it, well that is a whole new aspect of our temperament.

I wonder what the mind tweakers, the mother earths, those who would make life great and the bloggers for business would make of this phenomena?

A lot of what I write is specific to each of the underlying temperaments but there are some things that span the temperaments. This is especially true if you are in the service industry or have a product to sell.

These guidelines will get you the broadest appeal.

1. Marketing and Budgeting
Businesses requires a marketing plan and a budget. There are ways to get the word out (marketing) about your site for free or fee. In any case, you need to advertise. One excellent technique is targeted commenting on high traffic sites. You may also purchase links on high-traffic sites that are related to your products. Expensive ads are not always the best. Less expensive, targeted ads can be an effective way to increase sales. Plan your marketing budget, implement it, and watch your results, and adjust as necessary.

2. Quality Images/Descriptions
Customers like to see items to help when making decisions to buy. Provide quality pictures and detailed descriptions. Ted Demopolous emphasizes this feature as being particularly important when marketing ebooks and other electronic media. Ted feels a quality “picture” makes the product more tangible to the buyer, and increases sales volume.

You should consider going to the community college to take a class in market photography. It will pay off in the long run. If not, hire a professional. But, developing the skill yourself will best long term solution.

3. Customer Service
Neck and neck in the race for repeat business are customer service and a quality product. Answer customer inquiries quickly, within hours if possible. Make certain you have a return policy in place and that it is easy for customers to access. When shipping an item, include promotional information with the package. Create a “FAQ” (frequently asked questions) page on your site containing questions that seem to get asked over and over. Make your site as user friendly and convenient as you can. Contracting a site design specialist might be a worthwhile investment at this time.

4. Online Ordering
It is nearly impossible to compete in today’s market without online ordering capabilities. Customers desire the convenience, ease and speed of online purchasing. Not only this, but with online purchasing as an option the merchant has the opportunity to capitalize on the opportunity of the “impulse buy.”

Here a few of the options available:

www.charge.com
www.merchantexpress.com
www.merchantseek.com
www.monstermerchantaccount.com
www.eaglemerchantservices.com

Additionally, you will need an automated way to track the customers desired purchase and provide them total costs at check out. There are several shopping cart programs that can provide this service for you.

As there are many providers that are specific to certain markets, I recommend you research you niche for the most advantageous provider for you.

Have you ever been in a situation in which the suggestions of an individual are dismissed out of hand, or possibly even ridiculed? Did it seem the dismissal was occurring just to create a point of contention? If you were in the presence of a Choleric it may well have been.

Sometimes we may even have been on the receiving end of the onslaught. On some occasions I have pointed out to the perpetrator (usually a choleric) what they were doing. Would you believe many cholerics were astonished when their conduct was pointed out and brought to their attention.

However, if you don’t make it clear you are aware of what they are doing the practice continues and worsens.

But, would you believe this practice of the choleric can have some positive effects for all of us?

Why discussion and contention raise the bar for performance for all of us.

Once we come to understand that we need to eliminate the concept of “right” and “wrong” when problem solving we have made tremendous progress. We must strive to replace these concept with what “works for me” or “doesn’t work for me.” This is an issue which must be a given when working with, or being a choleric. Without these avenues we come quickly to impasse and impasse leads to failure. Impasse should lead to discussion. That back and forth is the root of progress.

Participants (team members) in any endeavor must realize issues of contention exist, and it is by working through them that breakthroughs occur. But, in order to be productive all team members should recognize the benefits of contention.

A certain amount of contention is useful, otherwise we settle for easy solutions and don’t not push for superior answers. Cholerics, however, are known for pushing. Their demeanor helps the rest of us avoid  spending to much time addressing tertiary issues and focus on core concerns.

Does this create anxiety. Yes.  But, a modicum of anxiety is a good thing. It means there is growth into new areas.

Cholerics cause us to explore the “what if” situations. Even if it is just “what if” we got rid of them?

Still their “let’s make it happen” control temperament helps the rest of us consider all the options that we may then be examine.

So, is contention advantageous for the choleric? Yes. But, it is advantageous for the rest of us as well, provided we stand up for ourselves. We just don’t enjoy it the way a control seeking choleric does.

Much has been written about strategies for seeking and securing employment. Much less has been written about finding a way to stay happy once you have secured a position. Well, let’s take that step. Let’s say you have gotten that job of your dreams only to discover your still are not happy. What next?

Over the years I have encountered many people who simply are not suited to work for someone else, at least not exclusively(myself included). I usually suggest these folks read a few books I have to loan them. Without going in to specific titles, what follows here is the gist of most of those books.

Once you control for dumb luck and epiphanies there is really only one pathway to success in just about any business venture.

Due Diligence.

Due diligence in the legal definition has to do with the care a reasonable person would go to to prevent injury to himself or others. My definition expounds upon this when I apply it to business. I consider it the amount of effort a reasonable business person is willing devote to assuring their business is a success.

What do I mean by “reasonable person”? If you have committed yourself to the success of a business by putting all your financial resources, time, talent and experience into the business to the point you may be penniless and destitute if the business fails, you may consider yourself a reasonable business person. Well, not quite that strict, but very nearly.

How do you accomplish this?

1. Assess where you are right now in your life. The four “F’s.” How satisfied with the

• Fun,
• Family,
• Funds and
• Freedom in your life are you?

2. Describe your ideal life.
3. What do you love to do?
4. What do you do well?
Chose a business model.
1. Home based.
2. Separate physical location
3. Internet based.
4. Franchise.
Build a business plan.
1. Define your concept.
2. Is there a need?
3. Identify your model.
4. Why is yours better than the others?
5. How large is the market?
6. Define your role.
7. Identify your partners.
8. Identify your book keeping and money intake methodology.
9. How much start up money will you need?
10. Identify your funding sources.
11. Identify your success criteria.
Write a business plan.
1. Executive Summary.
2. Business Description.
3. Market Analysis.
4. Marketing and distribution.
5. Personnel.
6. Ultimate Business Goal.
7. Financial Breakdown.
Choose your ownership model.
1. Soul proprietorship.
2. Corporation.
3. Partnership.
4. Limited Liability Companies.
Funding your business.
1. Bootstrapping
2. Debt Financing
3. Grants
4. Friends and Family
5. Angel Investors
6. Factoring
7. Venture Capitalists
Describe the logistics.
1. Accounting
2. Legal Services
3. Insurance
4. Banking
5. Information Technology
6. Website Development
7. Merchant Banking/e-Commerce
8. Travel
9. Real Estate

Of course if you are a Sanguine just forget about this and go have some fun!