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What is the difference between Behavior Consulting and Counseling? It is kind of like looking at the difference between secular and faith based counseling. In fact, there was no differentiation between secular and faith based counseling and behavioral coaching until the 1800’s. Up until that point all three fell into the pervue of the church. The clergy took on the daunting task of bringing hope, counsel and guidance to those who were in need. Medical doctors took on the physical domain and the two didn’t disparage one another.

I. Faith Based Counseling and Secular Counseling.

In the early history of the Church, the Church itself was solely responsible for the counseling of people. As society grew the perception developed that the Christian Community was no longer qualified to counsel its people. As a result, the secular community has all but taken over the responsibility of counseling and behavior modification.

II. Contrasting Faith Based and Secular Counseling

A. Secular Counselor = Agent of the State = Insurance Coverage May Apply

Precepts

1. Everyone has problems; you must learn to live with it. These strategies may help.
2. Human behavior is based on millions of years of evolution. You must continue to evolve emotionally.
3. Self is most important; as long as you do not infringe upon the self of others do what you need to be happy.
4. The problems of self can often be traced to the behaviors of others.

B. Faith Based = Agent of the Church = Fees are often a sliding scale and insurance coverage may not apply.

Precepts

1. Cast off your sins; Christ, the perfect sacrifice has paid the price.

2. God created each of us with a specific temperament. Fighteing your temperament creates disharomony in your sense of well being.

3. God is most important. True happiness is accessible through our proper duty to Him.

4. Face (confess) and accept the consequences (repent) of your actions.

III. Faith based view.

God created us with three areas of need (Inclusion, Control, and Affection) which we may meet through His service.

Inclusion

The need to initiate and maintain surface relationships.

The need to be approached by others for surface relationships.

Control

The need to be in control of relationships with others.

The need for others to control our relationships and behaviors.

Affection

The need to establish love and affection relationships with others.

The need to receive love and affection from others.

IV. The Five Temperament Types. Faith based view.

1. The Melancholy - Forever examining their own shortcomings.

2. The Choleric - Confident and task oriented.

3. The Sanguine - Extremely socially active.

4. The Supine - Quintessential servant ever placing the needs of others first.

5. The Plegmatic - Extremely deliberate perfectionist.

V. So What?

Temperament is an extremely important factor to consider when:

1. Finding compatible career.

2. Finding hobbies that bring the most satisfaction.

3. Making decisions and undertaking responsibilities.

4. Choosing your level of dependence or independence.

5. Charting our spiritual development.

6. Choosing and understanding our mate.

If there ever was an arranged marriage that seemed ideally suited it would appear to be Sanguines and Social Media. But, you know, it’s not as perfect as it sounds. Once you get beyond the titles the divergence makes sense too.

Sanguines are all about interacting with people on an up close and personal basis. They need to see your face and touch your hand. They have an underlying compulsion to be with living breathing, carbon based life forms. Now juxtapose that with Social Media. By the very nature (at least at first) Social Media is technology based. You must spend a considerable amount of time building a virtual reality of jungle vine connections. Then you must employ your very best Tarzan/Jane skill set to navigate the highways of the canopy to reach your connection destinations.

You can see how the medium would be a struggle for the sanguine at the early levels of development.

If a Sanguine is to be successful with a Social Media platform it must have one indispensable component. It must be FUN.

No matter what the ultimate pay out of the work investment in building a network, if there is no immediate entertainment value the Sanguine is not interested.

With this information you can see how Sanguines would be more drawn to FaceBook, Flickr, and Showhype than to LinkedIn which is more for professionals who are looking for networking opportunities.

Original article in the series.

 

I’ve worked on several projects that have been connected in some way to Dr. Ghungsho Zhang. Most of the work has taken the form of his identification of a trend indicated in a numerical analysis and my development of a program to enhance or accommodate for that trend. For example, Dr. Zhang unidentified an over representation of males in discipline referrals and special education referrals in North Carolina. As a result, I developed a series of trainings for teachers which explored how male and female students have natural conduct differences that cannot be addressed in the same ways.

What does that have to do with temperament and social media?

Just this, just because something can be easily measured doesn’t mean it is important. For example, it was easy to measure the cycles of the moon (sunspots, comet proximity, tides, favorite ice cream flavors, etc) when incidents of misbehavior occur but that doesn’t mean the two are connected in any real way.

Again, so what?

That brings us to the numbers of Social Media. It is easy to measure (or at least estimate) the number of users of social media but without knowing the underlying temperament of those measured we will not understand the nature of their use of the medium.

Here are some of the numbers based on a study conducted by Raplief .

Bebo 5,806,867 members
” Bebo is a social media network where friends share their lives and explore great entertainment.”

Blackplanet 1,201,687 members
” BlackPlanet.com is your place to meet and connect with African Americans around the country.”

Classmates 3,051,761 members
“Find a friend or high school alumni from more than 40 million members in over 200000 affiliations at Classmates.com.”

Facebook 5,920,236 members
“An online directory that connects people through social networks at colleges.”

Flickr 2,068,097 members
“Flickr is almost certainly the best online photo management and sharing application in the world.”

Flixter 17,647,399 members
” Flixster is a community for movie fans of all shapes and sizes.”

Friendster 5,260,380 members
“Friendster is focused on helping people stay in touch with friends and discover new people and things that are important to them.”

Hi5 14,679,615 members
“hi5 helps its members stay connected with friends, family and others that are important to them in a simple, fun and safe online environment.”

LinkedIn 841,209 members
“Our mission is to help you be more effective in your daily work and open doors to opportunities using the professional relationships you already have.”

Multiply 1,354,647 members
“Multiply gives you an easy way to share all kinds of digital media, including photos, blogs, videos, music and more, all in one convenient place: your own personal web site.”

MySpace 31,845,954 members
“Create a community on MySpace and you can share photos, journals and interests with your growing network of mutual friends!”

MyYearbook 2,449,251 members
Offers quizzes and a weblog section, as well as videos and free content from CliffsNotes.”

Perfspot 1,159,539 members
“Secure your personal privacy. Find old friends. Have unlimited uploads and much more. For more information, visit us online”

Ringo 9,770,151 members
“Photo and Video Sharing Made Easy”  As you can see Social Media evolves and devolves FAST! Between the time I drafted this article in June and July 6 Ringo went off-line.

Tickle 6,481,601 members
“Tickle is the leading interpersonal media company, providing self-discovery, and social networking services to more than 17 million active members in its community worldwide.”

In each provider the lion’s share of the users are between the ages of 17 and 35. With the major exception being LinkedIn which has is greatest percentage (nearly 25%) of members in the 35-44 year old age bracket.

Still, so what? If you don’t know how these people are using social media to help meet their needs for control, inclusion and affection you really don’t know what is going on here.

Tori Deaux and I are going to try and use this series of articles to explore that concept.

Original article in the series.

flikr image

Social Media is a current hot topic just about everywhere. People are scrambling to “join the conversations” on the various services, but also finding themselves frustrated (see Tori’s article “Why I suck at social media…” )

One aspect of that widespread frustration can be explained through personality temperaments (for an overview, check out this interactive graphic from MindTweaks, or this text overview here on Elemental Truths)

Each temperament and combination of has a different approach to technology, different needs when it comes to socialization.

Extroverts are happy to seek out new friends and contacts, while introverts are more hesitant, preferring to just observe, or to let others come to them.Some temperaments are quick to embrace change, while others prefer more familiar, consistent, and proven technologies. Privacy is also a personality driven issue, as some temperaments need to feel safe and protected, in order to participate in a social environment, while others would be happy with their own posse of cyber paparazzi. Also important is the level of control people have over their use of the service, including visibility, profiles, spam, and so on. We all use the services for different reasons, too - many of them related to temperaments: find customers, build a network of new friends, stay in touch with existing friends, share and inspire creativity, get and provide answers to questions, or just be generally social with strangers.

The frustration appears because most of the latest, greatest social technologies only address the needs of *some* of the temperament types, and make others distinctly uncomfortable, or even anxious. So being successful at social media means knowing which services are best suited to our individual personality, and how to participate comfortably even on services that aren’t well suited to our specific temperaments - otherwise, we run the risk of losing touch with our existing social circles made up of a variety of personalities, and winding up only with friends and contacts in a limited range of temperament - which is not a good thing. The best and most effective social groups (for any purpose) are made up of a variety of personality types.

It’s worth noting that while the older forms of social media (message boards, chat rooms, and instant messaging services) didn’t provide the networking or portability benefits of Web2.0 applications like Facebook, Twitter and Flickr, they did better provide a comfortable space for *all* of the personality types. Hopefully the new services will resolve the conflicts in time - meanwhile, we’ll have to find our own solutions.

So over the next week Reg and I will be exploring the topic of temperament and social media, considering the pros and cons of each service for each personality, from Supine to Melancholy, as well as offering advice on how the various personalities can best use the services for our advantage. We’ll be posting a series of interlinked articles addressing the issue on MindTweaks and Elemental Truths, but you’ll also be able to come back here, and find a listing of all of the links.

We’re hoping the result will be fun, useful, creative, productive, and reduce frustration levels. And *that* should cover just about all of the personality types!

This is a checklist I (Reg) came up with that will give you a fair overview of what YOUR TEMPERAMENT might be.

Other articles in this series.

• Temperaments and Social Media - ET
• Interactive Temperament Graphic -MT
• Social Media and The 5 Temperaments - MT
• In Social Media Measurable Doesn’t Equal Important - ET
• Supines and Social Media - ET
• Surviving Social Media:The Supine Struggle - MT
• Sanguines and Social Media - ET
• The Social Butterfly Meets Social Technology: The Challenges for Sanguines - MT
• Melancholies and Social Media - ET
• In Search of Intimacy: The Melancholy and Social Media - MT
• Phlegmatics and Social Media - ET
• Qietly Participatory: The Phlegmatic and Social Media - MT
• Cholerics and Social Media - ET
• Control and Conquer!: The Choleric and Social Media - MT

Open Source social media platforms we won’t address in depth (in no particular order). By the way, open source just means that you can read the programming code, change the code, modify the code and redistribute the code, usually free of charge.

• spree
• iSocial
• Mahara
• Yogurt
• VMukti
• The PeopleAggregator
• Appleseed
• Mugshot Project
• GetBoo
• Akarru
• Scuttle
• SemanticScuttle
• AROUNDMe
• Clonesumating
• BeWelcome Rox
• ICEcore
• Memephage
• InteractOLE
• Elgg
• CommunityNews
• OpenPNE
• MonkeyChow
• NewsCloud
• Feed Me Links
• WorldSpace
• Social Networking POC
• Zoints
• earth-life-simulation
• PHPizabi
• OzcodeOzcode
• TallStreet
• Jamss
• Dolphin
• Ospo
• AstroSPACES
• FlightFeather
• SNOSS
• OpenSocialNetwork
• S3B
• Facelift

 

 

 

 

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1. Find a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed.

2. Read the entire test before you mark any marks.least like you. Be objective.

3. Before each word in each column enter a number from 1-5.

• Five being most like you.

• One being least like you.

• Be objective.

4. Solicit two friends to complete the profile rating you in the same way.

5. AFTER marking your responses continue to the scoring key.

 

Choleric Phlegmatic Melancholy Sanguine Supine

Self ­­­_______ _______ _______ _______ _______

Friend ­­­­­_______ _______ _______ _______ _______

Friend _______ _______ _______ _______ _______

 

Grading Instructions:

Add only the 3-5 numbers which occur in each column (omit the 1’s and 2’s). Place the totals on the indicated lines.

Analyzing the Results

Your score summary now contains your feelings as well as the input of your friends. In most cases there will be some variation. However, your dominate temperament should be readily identifiable as the larger score.

These are, of course, very casual views based on the work of Dr. James Arno and some writings of Tim LaHaye. But, they can provide some interesting insight into your underlying temperament.

Temperament Overview

Choleric

Motivation: Power

Needs: To Look Good (Academically), To Be Right, To Be Respected, Approval

Wants: To Hide Insecurities (Tightly), To Please Self, Leadership, Challenging Adventure

Positives: Independent, Have Goals, Know How They Want to Solve a Problem, Decisive, Visionary

Negatives: Cruel, Egotistical, Unemotional, Domineering, Unforgiving

Melancholy

Motivation: Intimacy

Needs: To Be Good (Morally), To Be Understood, To Be Appreciated, Acceptance,

Wants: To Reveal Insecurities, To Please Others, Autonomy, Security

Positives: Gifted, Self Sacrificing, Helpful, Thoughtful, Faithful

Negatives: Moody, Critical, Negative, Resentful, Suspicious

Phlegmatic

Motivation: Peace

Needs: To Feel Good (Inside), To Be Understood, To Be Respected, Acceptance, To Reveal Insecurities

Wants: To Please Others, Protection, Contentment

Positives: Peace Makers, Quiet, High Self Control, Calm in a Crisis, Efficient, Good Listener

Negatives: Unmotivated, Procrastinate, Indecisive, Fearful, Avoider

Sanguine

Motivation: Fun

Needs: To Look Good (Socially), To Be Popular, To Be Praised, Approval

Wants: To Hide Insecurities (Loosely), To Be Noticed, Freedom, Playful Adventure

Positives: Entertaining, Outgoing, Responsive, Warm, Friendly

Negatives: Undependable, Undisciplined, Egotistical, Prone to Exaggeration, Compulsive Talker

Supine

Motivation: Contribution

Needs: To Look Humble, To Serve a Greater Purpose, To Be Accepted, To Protect Weaknesses.

Wants: Recognition for Service, Opportunities to Serve, To Contribute to a Higher Calling, To Be Protected

Positives: Caring, Giving, Gentle, Dependable, Loyal

Negatives: Insecure, Manipulative, Weak Willed, Indecisive, Harbors Ill Will

 

 

Free Online Tests

http://www.oneishy.com/personality/personality_test.php

http://www.advisorteam.com/temperament_sorter/register.asp

http://www.olympus.net/personal/athena/

 

 

It is a common misconception that the temperament of a person is simply, Choleric, or Sanguine, or Phlegmatic, or Melancholy, or Supine. In fact, no one (at least no one I’ve ever encountered) is a “Pure Temperament.” People are a blend of temperaments and giving them a label is simply an attempt to put a lens the most dominant element of their temperament.

“Why would you want to do that?”

The simple answer is, it is less cumbersome. It is easier for us all to conceptualize some one as a Melancholic than it is to say he or she is a Pure Melancholy in Inclusion, a Compulsive Melancholy in Control and Melancholy Phlegmatic in Affection. Viewing an individuals as a whole gives you and I the opportunity to understand and interact with them in the most conducive and productive way.

What if someone really is a “Pure” temperament?

A person who had a “pure” temperament would likely fit the symptomatic criteria of an “obsessive.”

Imagine someone who was compulsive about their needs in control, affection and inclusion no matter what the situation or circumstances and you will have a fair view of someone with a “pure” temperament.

Which is the “Best” temperament?

It is my belief that while certain temperament traits are more beneficial in certain circumstances, no single temperament type is best for all situations.

I welcome the view of a complete soul, once conjoined of all the five temperaments that was split-apart into its separate components, which now seeks the path to its former consummate perfection.

Another view I embrace is that of the Messianic ideal, in which all the temperament elements which are perfectly synchronized and blended into the all elements into the exemplification we all seek to attain.

So, what IS a blended temperament?

A blended temperament is what you and I are. We have a definite dominate temperament aspect, but we also have other elements of our temperaments that are experienced as our “comfort levels” in the areas of Control, Inclusion and Affection.

How will this knowledge help you?

This knowledge, like any other, is of little practical value in and of itself. However, when you apply it to your interactions with other people, it is an invaluable tool of understanding and building mutually beneficial relationships. Consider, if you will, how collaboration, cooperation and leadership could be enhanced if each party had a true understanding of the elemental essence of the other person.

Now what?

With the insight you will gain from the upcoming examples you will be more able to work productively and live with others in peaceful coexistance.

I have just published my first Squidoo lens.

Let me know what you think.

Melding Psychology, Philosophy and Practical Knowledge Into a Scaffold for Success!

If you have a Sanguine among the members family or or close friends you will surely know it. They are friendly, talkative, optimistic, funny, big picture people, exciting, funny and extremely enthusiastic. On the other hand they can also be messy, loud and forever late. They lose things and they often miss appointments.

What should you buy for them? Basically, you shouldn’t worry too much, as long as it sparkles :0).

Seriously, though Sanguines are delighted by anything new or novel. Choose over the top, frivolous items. Silly slippers, electric ties and singing bass are gifts that will be well received. Items that require a lot of discipline quickly lose interest for them.

• Comedy Club Tickets - Zanies Comedy Club in Nashville is a crowd pleasure.
• Concert tickets - Smash Mouth is a lot of fun.
• Dinner show tickets - If you are in FL, TX, GA, SC, IL, MD, NJ, CA or Toronto Medieval Times is a blast.
• Jewelry - Anything with diamonds, rubies, emeralds, turquoise or sapphires is a good choices as long as it isn’t too subdued.
• Flowers/cologne - Maitre Parfumeur et Sanguine Musikissime is an amazing choice but at $105 a ml you better hope they don’t misplace it.
• Coffee Cards - Right now Starbucks is still fun and trendy, a veritable prescription for the sanguine temperament for pleasure.

I am so often asked for the source of my perspective and advice of personal and professional development and human interaction from those I counsel I think it would be prudent to review the model again here.

I work from the perspective that there are certain foundational needs that every human being experiences. Those needs are the need to receive and give affection; the need to include and be included by others; and the need to control and be controlled by others.

Many of the counseling techniques utilized by psychologists, psychiatrists, social workers, and behavior specialists are based on these foundational concepts. These same concepts have been standardized and measured for everything from marital computability to career placement.

The odd thing to me is that practitioners of one type of temperament analysis so often decry and denounce practitioners of another type when most are based on the very same seminal philosophies.

The concept of the Temperaments has appeared over and over throughout history from at least 340 B.C. to the present. For centuries the temperaments were categorized into 4 groups based on the different types of body fluids. Many of those are listed in the table below.

All of the following are based on the work of Hipocrates c450 B.C.

and his four ordinal temperament types: Choleric, Phlegmatic,

Sanguine and Melancholic.

Plato c340 B.C.  | Artisan      Guardian    Idealist      Rational
Aristotle c325   | Hedonic      Propietary  Ethical       Dialectical
Galen c190 AD    | Sanguine     Melancholic Choleric      Phlegmatic
Paracelsus 1550  | Changeable   Industrious Inspired      Curious
Adickes 1905     | Innovative   Traditional Doctrinaire   Skeptical
Spranger 1914    | Aesthetic    Economic    Religious     Theoretic
Kretschmer 1920  | Hypomanic    Depressive  Hyperesthetic Anesthetic
Fromm 1947       | Exploitative Hoarding    Receptive     Marketing
Myers 1958       | Probing      Scheduling  Friendly      Tough-minded

It would an unprecedented phenomenon if at least some of this information was not founded in elementally true concepts.

Indicator	Sanguine Entertainer	Choleric Ruler	Melancholic Computer	Phlegmatic Supporter	Supine Servant
Behavior	creative, warm, charismatic, energetic	controls, dictates	attentive to details, systematic	agreeable, personable, friendly, caring, helpful	highly aware of and responsive to need in others
Under Pressure	loud talk, fast talk, comply	yell, blow up, bully, throw tantrums, take pot-shots, display arrogance	become silent, flee, withdraw, autocrat	submit, accommodate, gunny -sack, passive -aggressive	fearful, yet diligent
Payoff	Communication, attention, compliance	feel superior, dominate others	consistent, well prepared	illusion of harmony, never take risks	finds fulfillment in serving others
Strength	people oriented, persuasive, verbally skilled, optimistic	decisive, GTD, self -confident	accurate, factual, precise, organized	likable, loyal, team player, steadfast, patient	driven to serve, enjoy people, gentle spirit
Weakness	egotistical, lack follow -through, flighty	intimidating, alienating	stubborn, boring, aloof, unimaginative	indecisive, dawdler, gullible, uncommunicative	indirect behavior, harbor anger, hurt feelings, feeling powerless
Needs	popularity, warmth, social recognition, emotional connection	control, power, to be right	controlled environment, security, order, continuity	security, connectivity, belonging, to please others, predictability	acceptance, acknowlegment, self -direction
Successful Interaction Tools	flexibility, enthusiasm, listening, visuals	support, directness, business like, task orientation	step by step, facts, logic, structure, tie new to old	casual, informal, listen, lessen pace, goals, personal development	build on relationships, provide acceptance

The table above is designed to provide and overview of the behaviors typically displayed by individuals of each temperament under the listed circumstances. Although, it will not provide a complete picture of the temperament of the individual (a temperament analysis would be needed for that) it will provide a lens through which to view these behaviors as they are displayed.

As you can see the margins are out of alignment. I have done what I could to adjust the HTML code to conform the table to the structure of the web-page and even though it is not perfectly adjusted, I felt it was a tool of significant value to warrant its inclusion.

If you take the time to become familiar with this table I believe it will prove indispensable as a tool for understanding your own behavior, that of others and the personal and professional development of both.

If you find it useful, I would request that you add Elemental Truths to your bloglines reader and share links with others who you feel would benefit from it. As always, I invite you to comment and visit often.